My Word with Douglas E. Welch

When your children grow up – End of the Day for April 23. 2014

April 23rd, 2014 dewelch No comments

Watching your children grow older is always interesting, but never more so then when they are teenagers. Watching the dance as they take the first tentative steps into relationships and commitments like high school and college can be like watching a movie that is released in installments. Like Dickens and his writing, each new chapter comes with something unexpected along with with a bit of confusion and a bit of angst. Still, watching this “movie” can be utterly fascinating. When you have a screenwriter in the house, things can get even crazier. She starts to write scripts and stories of how their lives will play out simply because it is what she does as a writer, not because it has any basis in reality. (LAUGH)

Joseph as Tony in West Side Story

With each step along the way, I cross my fingers and hope I have given my son all the knowledge and tools he needs to negotiate this confusing time of life. Not everything can be explained or taught, though. There are difficult lessons that can only be learned through experience. That said, I hope that I have shown my son that he can talk with me about nearly anything, if he needs to. I can’t always tell him what to do, but I can always listen.

I think that is part of the secret of parenthood, if there are any secrets at all. You need to set boundaries, but you also need to know that there are times and places when they are out of your direct control. All you can do it try to instill the intelligence and morals necessary to make the right decisions at the right time. You can’t live your life for them. You can only help them start their lives with the best resources and skills possible.

Previously on End of the Day:

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Photo: Goat cheese, spinach, bacon pizza. Yum! via Instagram

April 23rd, 2014 dewelch No comments

We picked up a pizza crust from Joe Peeps in Studio City and put together this yummy pizza using Easter Dinner leftovers. Mine had goat cheese, some cubes of Peit Basque, spinach leaves, bacon bits all over my homemade pizza sauce. Rosanne added tomatoes, olives and mushrooms to her side, too.

Photo posted via Instagram

Categories: Photos Tags: instagram, photo, picture

Share your “invisible self” online for better relationships – End of the Day for April 22, 2014

April 22nd, 2014 dewelch No comments

As social media has become a larger and larger part of lives, there has been much discussion about anonymity and privacy in our lives. Everyday we are confronted with articles warning us about the dangers of oversharing, sharing our location or even our thoughts. While I do agree that there are certain things you should never, if rarely, share online, most of us error greatly on the side of not sharing enough. We have a certain invisible self that never shows up online and limits how others see and understand us. I say its time to open up the curtain a bit and let your online contacts see more about you than what you had for lunch today.

Yes, there are countless stories about tasteless, destructive or criminal oversharing, but I believe these stories are only so prominent in the press because they are so rare. News outlets report on the exceptions in the world, not the norm and this sometimes causes us to confuse one for the other. Sure, one person posted to Facebook that they robbed the local liquor store, but millions didn’t rob a liquor store, nor would they post about it if they did!

Invisible online

Rather, I think we often hide away from our online contacts — posting only the most innocuous, pleasant or meaningless drivel and pretending it is “friendship.” The truth is, your real friends see more than you would perhaps like the to see and know perhaps more than you would like them to know, but that is part-and-parcel of friendship. Maybe the lack of connection that people often bemoan in social media comes from our own self-censorship, rather than any limitation of the technology itself.

For this reason, I would like to call on all of us, myself included, to start to share more of our invisible lives online and with our contacts there. In my case, I share a lot online, but there are a lot of things I don’t come right out and say. People who know me well probably know my political, religious and societal opinions and you might even be able to divine them the articles I post and share. Still, I am uncomfortable, in many cases, of coming right out and saying them. Maybe I need to be better about that. Perhaps people would understand me a but better, if like me less, if I shared more of those opinions? Who knows. This is a somewhat invisible part of me that I self-censor on a regular basis.

There are many parts of our invisible lives that we can and should share, though. What do you believe? What do you want? In love? In life? in death? Who do you love? Who do you hate? Why? Why do you do anything you do? Why can be a very simple word, but it often comes with a very difficult answer.

Part of the reason for my self-censorship ( and probably yours) in sharing thoughts like this come from the fear of being judged. I have carried this fear all my life and even at 50 still feel it deeply. That said, I am also getting to be old enough that I finally understand the words, “Those who mind don’t matter and those that matter don’t mind!” Friends (and online followers) who matter will stick with you when the going gets tough and the edges get rough. Those who won’t probably — in most cases — weren’t really connected to you anyway, except via a friends list. You may not always agree with what someone thinks or says, but if there is enough commonality, the benefits of friendship remain.

Take some time to think about what your LIKE to say to your friends and then say it. Face the fear and the consequences. Engage in an intelligent dialogue with people. Maybe you’ll change your opinion, maybe not. Converting others opinions isn’t the point. Rather it is the sharing, the discussion and the deepening of relationships that really matter. Share a little bit of your invisible life and I think you will be surprised with the results.

Previously on End of the Day:

Categories: End-of-the-Day, New Media, Technology, Writing Tags:

Photo: Friday Morning via #instagram

April 22nd, 2014 dewelch No comments

Friday morning

Previously in my Instagram Photos…

See all my photos on Flickr

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Jobs Available – All types of job listings at Jobs.WelchWrite.com – Search by keyword and location

April 22nd, 2014 dewelch No comments

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Your local library is even more useful and important today than in the past! — End of the Day for April 21, 2014

April 21st, 2014 dewelch No comments

As is part of my normal blogging and new media processes, I posted about a few books today. The fact is, iI’m always posting about unique books that catch my eye, Sometimes I immediately read them and at others I collect them up in my “to read eventually list”. In each blog post, I typically link to Amazon.com, but this isn’t necessarily to have you purchase the books there, but rather as a source for reviews and more information about each book. As you might know already, I do have an Amazon affiliate account, so I make a few pennies on each purchase that is made, but that is secondary to the great information and reviews that are to be found there. Of course, the Amazon affiliate income does help to pay for some web site cost and such, so every little bit helps.

Our neighborhood Free Little Library — Click for photos and video

It’s always important to remember that even in today’s high-tech age, you can find so many books available at your local public library — in so many forms. Your local library is free — you’ve already paid for its services with your tax dollars. These days it’s so easy to have a book pulled from another branch and sent to your local library or — even more importantly, read books in electronic format via the freeKindle, OverDrive and other applications. These apps run right on your iPhone, iPad or other mobile device. In most case you can also read these books directly in your compute, if needed or desired. From most libraries you can also get audiobooks music videos and more. In one personal example, we were in Orange County yesterday visiting friends and family for the holiday yesterday. Since we don’t have Wifi at that house, I knew I wanted to have some reading material on hand to occupy myself before people arrived. Using the free Zinio app (and my LA Public Library card) I was able to download a collection of traditional magazines like Smithsonian, Food Network Magazine, Saveur and more directly to my Kindle Fire. Then, even without an Internet connection, I was able to kick back and read much like I would have with paper magazines in the past.

We have always been big users of libraries. I even worked in the University Library during my college years. After filling our apartment with books, Rosanne and I agreed that we wouldn’t purchase new books until we at least check them out of the library, if available. This was to make sure that the book was important enough to actually want to have a copy in our own personal library. So many books are a quick read, but not something you want around for rereading later. This is especially true of many of the business books that I read. With those books, I typically pull out one or two great ideas, but I don’t really need my own personal copy.

There are also many sources for free public domain books like the classics which you have always been “meaning to read” like Don Quixote, The Three Musketeers, Darwin’s Origin of Species, Keats and Shelly poems and more. One of my favorite sites for that type of reading material is the Gutenberg.org website. You’ll also find many of these public domain books, for free, available via Amazon.com as a Kindle book. This is my typical source when Joseph needs a classic piece of literature for one of his school classes. He has an older Kindle Touch that hold those books as well as some of his purchased text books for easy availability and use.

In these days of higher and higher tech, it may seem anachronistic to use about your local public library, but there are many great resources available for you there every day. In many way, today’s public libraries are even more important and useful than they were in the past. Check them out!

Previously on End of the Day:

Categories: Books, End-of-the-Day, Writing Tags:

Link Focus: Food: Ginger Scones from Mountain Breaths

April 21st, 2014 dewelch No comments

Ginger Scones from Mountain Breaths

Despite the fact that I shouldn’t eat them nearly as often as I do, I love making and eating scones. I came across this recipe for Ginger Scones in my travels and quickly added to my “to bake” list. (Don’t you have a “to bake” list? (LAUGH))

Sometimes I think that people are a bit scared of making scones, when really they are one of the easiest (and tastiest) baked good out there. This recipe lays out everything quite clearly so that anyone — yes, even I — can follow the directions and end up with great scones. I love the inclusion of the candied ginger in the scones much like you might include cranberries or other dried fruit. I can almost imagine those potent pops of ginger as you munched.

From Mountain Breaths…

Blogging has introduced me to a wonderful community of peers, and we learn so much from one another. I enjoy hiking, kayaking, cross country skiing and snowshoeing in the Adirondack Mountains (thus Mountain Breaths). I live in Upstate NY with my supportive husband and have three precious sons.

More on scones from Amazon.com…

More books on scones on Amazon.com

Previously on Link Focus:

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