I was sitting at my favorite local coffee shop the other day, reading some email and sipping my latte, when it suddenly became a very stressful place to be. Two tables away a man sat talking loudly on his cell phone. While I wasn’t necessarily upset that he was talking on his phone, the tenor of his conversation made my chest clench with anxiety. He was obviously having trouble with a business partner and spent 15-20 minutes laying out his troubles in graphic detail.Then, a short time later, I heard another conversation begin, even more angry and graphic than the first. One woman was complaining vociferously to her friend about how she had systematically been frozen out of a business relationship. I was amazed at what she was saying within clear earshot of any number of strangers. Again, her anger spilled out regardless of who might be listening.Airing our dirty laundry in a public place is never a good idea. You never know who might be listening — a friend of your target, the target themselves, future clients or employers. While I have taken that up in past columns, I want to address a deeper issue of this behavior in this one. Too often we replace action with anger. We spend our time in unproductive complaining instead of getting something done.
Douglas E. Welch (http://douglasewelch.com) presents to the class Career Development – Theories and Techniques at Pepperdine Graduate School of Education & Psychology taught by fellow CareerCamp Co-Chair, Danielle Gruen
The two biggest challenges are deciding what you want to do as a career and then building the career you deserve once you decide.
I discuss the Career Compass method of discovering your career wants, needs and desires and then using various social media tools to show people “What you do and how well you do it”
Transcript:
Now this also helps you to say no to the wrong opportunities when they come up. Because that’s another big thing. You’ve heard today, I’m sure, about the power in saying no. You have to “know” when to say “no” to things. Because they may not be a good fit for you. They may be a good fit for somebody else. They may be a good fit for your coworker. They may be a good fit for your company, but they may not be a good fit for you and you need the power and the intelligence and the thinking to say no to those opportunities. The fact is, there are too many people out there today who will gladly tell you what to do with your career. Your spouse will gladly tell you what to do with your career. Your children will gladly tell you. Your co-workers. Your boss. Everyone — if you don’t decide what to do in your career, there are a million people out there — everyone from your boss to the guy to talk to at the bus stop — will gladly tell you what you should be doing — including me. Which is why I say to take what I say as a grain of salt and try to apply what I say to you, don’t think of it as some directive that says you MUST do this.
Douglas E. Welch (http://douglasewelch.com) presents to the class Career Development – Theories and Techniques at Pepperdine Graduate School of Education & Psychology taught by fellow CareerCamp Co-Chair, Danielle Gruen
The two biggest challenges are deciding what you want to do as a career and then building the career you deserve once you decide.
I discuss the Career Compass method of discovering your career wants, needs and desires and then using various social media tools to show people “What you do and how well you do it”
Transcript:
Now this also helps you to say no to the wrong opportunities when they come up. Because that’s another big thing. You’ve heard today, I’m sure, about the power in saying no. You have to “know” when to say “no” to things. Because they may not be a good fit for you. They may be a good fit for somebody else. They may be a good fit for your coworker. They may be a good fit for your company, but they may not be a good fit for you and you need the power and the intelligence and the thinking to say no to those opportunities. The fact is, there are too many people out there today who will gladly tell you what to do with your career. Your spouse will gladly tell you what to do with your career. Your children will gladly tell you. Your co-workers. Your boss. Everyone — if you don’t decide what to do in your career, there are a million people out there — everyone from your boss to the guy to talk to at the bus stop — will gladly tell you what you should be doing — including me. Which is why I say to take what I say as a grain of salt and try to apply what I say to you, don’t think of it as some directive that says you MUST do this.
In engaging with transition, one of the most important aspects is you have to engage in yourself. Again, in this fear, we can sometimes retreat from ourselves and bury ourselves in coffee or chocolate or alcohol or whatever our particular vice is. The fact is, the more you know about yourself, the more you will know about your life and your career. Too many of us simply look out on the established careers — the established professions — the established companies — the established jobs — and say, “I MUST follow that path. There is only one path through the maze and I have to follow that path.” Well, as I know personally myself — naaaah. I don’t fit. For a variety of reasons, I do not fit into that normal career path and it took me a long time to figure that out.
In engaging with transition, one of the most important aspects is you have to engage in yourself. Again, in this fear, we can sometimes retreat from ourselves and bury ourselves in coffee or chocolate or alcohol or whatever our particular vice is. The fact is, the more you know about yourself, the more you will know about your life and your career. Too many of us simply look out on the established careers — the established professions — the established companies — the established jobs — and say, “I MUST follow that path. There is only one path through the maze and I have to follow that path.” Well, as I know personally myself — naaaah. I don’t fit. For a variety of reasons, I do not fit into that normal career path and it took me a long time to figure that out.